National Addiction Recovery Month
National Addiction Recovery month is an annual observance held every September. Its purpose is to educate Americans about the treatment of all forms of addiction, along with the mental health services available to enable those with these disorders to live a healthy and rewarding life.
In the words of the official declaration concerning National Recovery Month, “there are millions of Americans whose lives have been transformed through recovery. Recovery Month provides a vehicle for everyone to celebrate these accomplishments.”
Along with the usual information found under the heading of “Addiction” on my website, I have also added three articles by Gary Lange, Ph.D., on the subject of gambling and its potent addictive potential. Dr. Lange was my supervisor many years ago when I worked at The Betty Ford Center in California. He has since become a nationally known expert in the field of gambling addiction.
With great personal pride, I offer a brief bio concerning his background, followed by three short articles he’s written in the hopes of better explaining the extreme dangers of this particular form of addiction.
All of this can be found at my website: drtedsweb.com.
Gary Lange, Ph.D.
Gary Lange, Ph.D. is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice in Rancho Mirage, CA. He holds a National and California Certification as a Gambling Counselor and is Chair of the Training Committee for the California Council on Problem Gambling. Dr. Lange supervised the Family Program at the Betty Ford Center where he completed his dissertation on the recovery symptoms/patterns of family members. Additionally he is a Certified Addictions Specialist and has been a professor of Psychology with Cal State University, San Bernardino for the past twenty years.
Dr. Lange has done numerous professional presentations on problem gambling as well as the quarterly trainings for counselors seeking their Certification as a Gambling Counselor. Past topics included, “You Bet Your Life”, “When Luck Runs Out”. He has published articles for The Counselor and National Psychologist magazines.
“My Car Drives Itself to the Casino”
Dealing with Problem Gambling
I often hear this capricious phrase from problem gambling clients: “I don’t know how I ended up there; my car must have driven itself to the casino!” Denying the power of the obsession/addiction often leads the problem gambler to almost believe their vehicle has mysterious powers and acts on its own. Those who want to quit gambling can seek psychotherapy and attend supportive groups like Gamblers Anonymous but are still amazed how easily they can find themselves inside of a casino or placing a bet. Staying away from all gambling environments is a major first step in recovery.
March is National Problem Gambling Awareness (npgaw.org) month and an excellent time to learn more about this issue at a FREE seminar at the Desert Palms Recovery Center on Tuesday, March 4 at 6:00 pm. This lecture will be presented in English AND simultaneously in Spanish. Attendees can also learn more about FREE counseling for gamblers and their families through a program funded by the California Office of Problem Gambling (opg.org) and UCLA at no expense to the individuals.
In therapy the “recovering” gambler makes behavioral contracts, which involve commitments, and specific plans for safety. For example, a client may make this kind of an agreement: “I commit to you my therapist, sponsor or spouse, that I will drive this specific route to the pharmacy, this route to the supermarket and then directly home. I expect to be home by 4:30 at which time I’ll call you.” While this scenario seems incredibly simplistic, it is more crucial, in my experience, for gamblers than other addicts and alcoholics. Since Disordered Gambling is an addiction and brain illness, monitoring one’s impulses and setting up structured plans helps them avoid gambling behavior. Being able to trust another, make commitments and get “through” visceral urges are important steps in recovery. Many believe that handling their gambling urges 24 hours a day is a tall order, but we find most addicted people really only have strong cravings about 4 hours per day. Having a “safety” plan during those 4 hours helps prevent a relapse to old destructive behaviors. To accept one’s powerlessness (as in GA’s first step) and make non-gambling commitments are prodigious steps for many problem gamblers.
More than 1.5 million youth and adults in California and 20,000 in the Coachella Valley are considered problem gamblers according to the California Research Bureau. It is estimated that each problem gambler affects as many as eight other people in his or her life and need help as much as the families of any addict or mentally ill person. Spouses and family members often believe the gambler is having an affair or is a mythomaniac because of their lying and deceit.
Over time, many recovering gamblers are particularly positive, generous, and quite willing to “carry the message to other problem gamblers who still suffer.” They even come to humorously accept that their car is just an inanimate object that only goes where it is driven, just as they only go where THEY drive themselves!
Dr. Gary Lange is a Certified Gambling Counselor and Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in educating and treating problem gamblers and their families and can be reached at 760-773-1014 or Gary@GaryLangePhD.com
Tuesday, March 4, 2014; 6:00 p.m.
At the Desert Palms Recovery Center
67-580 Jones Rd, Cathedral City, 92232 (behind Target)
800.95.SOBER or DesertPalms.com
Stop the Gambling/Addiction Train
Many envision stopping an addiction to be quick and easy but it is more like stopping a train. A newly recovering addict or gambler may tell me in psychotherapy that they are willing to make a few changes until they feel better or the crisis is over. If you are the conductor of a train and want to stop going in one direction, it will take miles and an enormous amount of braking power to stop the train. The stopping time and distance is also dependent upon the amount of freight (perhaps the severity of the addiction) that is involved. The train, or addiction does not stop as soon as the brakes are applied; it will take some effort and time to stop the train. The recovering gambler or addict may feel that just not drinking or going to the casino or old hang outs for a while will stop the addiction. The train or addiction is slowing down but it is not stopped easily. To take the analogy further, one may need to sound the emergency horn to warn others of the danger and possibly the need for assistance.
I liken recovery to totally stopping the train in one direction and starting it up again in the opposite direction. As stated above, it takes some time and lot of energy to stop the train/addiction. It is necessary for most to have abstinence, supportive people and many changed behaviors for a long period of time. Further, many agree it is necessary for a daily commitment to abstinence and keeping the brakes on. Involving others and new healthy behaviors are part of switching directions toward health and happiness. The addict will chose new travel companions that are excited about going in the opposite direction. Some of the “old, former” travelers that were part of the addiction will get off at the next train station, and some will change and be able to continue in the new direction.
Our culture today is so quick and impetuous but recovery takes time and diligence. The 12 step programs offer medallions of encouragement at the first meeting, and at subsequent days: 15, 30, 60, 90, 180 and then each year thereafter. There are more rewards in the beginning because it is usually more difficult when the addict is reversing the direction of the train and getting “up to speed” in the new direction. Most importantly, rehabilitation programs were often short and now we realize that it takes months before we get established and comfortable in the new direction of life down the tracks of life and living.
Unfortunately there is no quick fix for addictions. Even Alcoholics Anonymous’s big book says that for some craving can be present for a long time… Just as the alcoholic is safer when he/she is not around alcohol or drinking friends, it is better for a newly recovering gambler to stay away from the old “playgrounds” where they gambled or engaged in their addictive behavior. It is best for gamblers to stay away from lottery tickets, casinos, online betting games and any kind of wagering. The methamphetamine addict should not hang out at places where methamphetamines are consumed.
Can the family get them to stop? We intuitively know that the answer is no, yet families and friends can help. Statistics show that when family members are involved in the gambler’s recovery process, his/her chances of recovery are doubled. Positive encouragement, better choices and behaviors are crucial. Behavioral assistance and help with decision making can interrupt the cravings. Most of us know that a desire for a late night snack can be very strong. Family support, compassion and patience can help with the impulsive urges. Psychotherapy helps with decision making, communication, and dealing with old unresolved feelings. Making healthy, safe and positive choices in early recovery builds confidence. Having a child, pet or supportive family to come home to is a great incentive for the gambling addict to come straight home rather than stop at the casino or old hang out.
Human beings are “herders,” and we survive and function better with the help of others. For example, from an evolutionary standpoint, we literally “survived” because supportive humans helped fight off the lion. A support group empathizes with human pain and can offer a safe and nurturing environment to deal with feelings and issues. Many who successfully find abstinence utilize 12 step or church programs. Both offer higher goals than a quick, but temporary fix.
So, how can the family or friends help? They can be members of the “pack” or support system and practice relaxation so they can eat, sleep and concentrate rather than obsess about others, the past or the negative. Many studies show how contagious a smile or act of kindness can be. GamAnon, AlAnon, Codependents Anonymous, Celebrate Recovery, Smart Recovery and Recovery Couples Anonymous are all groups that help family members. Again, when families and friends are sane and centered they can truly help by offering a listening ear of compassion and support.
We love our financial freedom and of course we can spend money 24/7. In the beginning stages of recovery, it is risky for a gambler to have access to too much money. Most would agree that it is ludicrous for a newly sober alcoholic/addict to have alcohol or cocaine in one’s pocket. Professional counseling facilitates communication and negotiation between the gambler and his family to help monitor financial resources. One recovering gambler might contract to entrust his pay check and debit card to his spouse while he only carries $40 cash and a gas card. Another might hire an accountant or financial advisor. “Joint” cooperation is necessary and again, no family member, therapist or IRS agent can keep a gambler from gambling if he/she wants to gamble. Supportive family members can only practice by helping and supporting the gambler/addict.
Please do not throw out the gambler/addict like a coffee maker that isn’t brewing good coffee. It takes years to develop relationships and blood family members will always have at least emotional ties. In my psychotherapy practice, not a day goes by when someone doesn’t talk about the heartache with a family member. But with help there is hope.
Petry, N. M., et.al. (2006). “Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Pathological Gamblers”, Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74(3), 555-567.
Gambling Away the Golden Years
$enior$ and Gambling
Seniors are increasingly the target for the fun, excitement, competitiveness, independence and social acceptance of gambling as a positive activity. This is because the “Golden Years” can also involve loneliness, boredom, loss of loved ones, physical illness/pain, retirement and loss of worth, which can all trigger “trips” to gambling venues. About 85% of adults have gambled and the numbers for them and specifically seniors are growing daily. Most seniors are “escape” gamblers and gravitate toward slot machines, bingo, raffles and the lottery because they want to escape or distract themselves. By contrast, “action” gamblers prefer cards, horse racing and sports betting. For some seniors, Casino “gaming” is a viewed as a safe, entertaining place where transportation is often provided and food is cheap. Unfortunately for those seniors, retirement can be lonely and boring but gambling provides an escape into a social, happy, albeit artificial world.
To differentiate among gamblers, most social gamblers risk money or something of value but don’t invest much time or money into the game whether they win or lose. Problem gamblers, on the other hand, spend considerable time and money on gambling even as they experience negative emotional and financial consequences. Pathological or compulsive gamblers have a loss of control over gambling, irrational thinking, depression, denial and continuation of the behavior despite serious adverse consequences. The pathological gambler often experiences financial problems, obtains money illegally, looses social and familial support and may feel suicidal. Treatment requires knowledge of addiction, plus how to deal with behavioral patterns similar to treating an impulsive adolescent, or a distracted senior. More than 1.5 million youth and adults in California are considered problem and pathological gamblers (California Research Bureau, 2006). “Problem gamblers affect eight to ten other people in their lives (Lobsinger & Beckett, 1996) and need our help as much as the families of any addict or mentally ill person. Casino visits comprise the most common form of “legal” gambling.
Many seniors live on a limited budget, while others may have disposable income. Their gambling losses make them highly vulnerable to the consequences of irregular eating, off-schedule medication, insomnia, embarrassment, guilt, a sedentary lifestyle, and a lowering of self-esteem. Positive, social and active lifestyles do not come from heavy losses at blackjack or the slots. The writing of bad checks is the most common illegal act of problem gamblers. Seniors may be particularly vulnerable to aggressive marketing. Gambling, like alcohol, drugs and other disorders, may be influenced by tendencies of addictive behaviors in one’s family of origin. Different brains react differently to stress and happiness. We love pleasant activities or feelings and the brain releases more Dopamine to reduce stress and increase pleasure-full feelings like any other addiction. Seniors need to remain active, eat nutritiously, and stay involved with supportive family and friends. Contrary to the myths of aging, seniors are generally healthy, maintain their intelligence, make sound judgments and are able to problem solve effectively. Less than 20% of seniors have memory impairment or need assistance with daily activities (Machemer, 1997). A positive attitude, a support system and a healthy self-esteem greatly enhance successful aging. Regrettably, gambling like other addictions is no respecter of age or economic status, and innocent gambling can lead to out-of-control problem gambling.
Part of the irrational thought of the gambler is that the “big win” is right around the corner. Loan me the money! The problem gambler progresses through three phases over time: winning, losing and desperation. The gambling “triggers” are everywhere including the raffles, lotteries, sporting events, office pools, computer/hand-held games, legal and illegal wagering as well as countless options on the Internet. Depression, anxiety, familial problems or aging are also common triggers, especially for the escape gambler. Counseling and treatment help the senior to identify and avoid the gambling triggers and choose healthier alternatives. The loss of control, the craving, and the persistence of gambling despite severe negative consequences is difficult to treat, but with help there is hope. Rebuilding trust and communication become crucial components of recovery. Gamblers Anonymous (GA) for the compulsive gambler and GamAnon for the family are wonderful adjunctive programs. Both groups provide a support system that clearly understands the problem and offers paths to freedom and serenity. Emotional and money management issues are top priorities. Since intense resentment and suicidal thoughts are common, the Seniors and their families’ safety need to be monitored.
Gambling can be fun, social and entertaining for seniors at any hour of the day or night. Unfortunately, gambling can also become a devastating problem, which can in turn prevent seniors from maintaining successful relationships and happiness in their golden years.
References
California Research Bureau, (2006) Gambling in the Golden State: 1998 Forward, 5/31/2006; Lange, Gary (2007) Liar, Liar, Money’s on Fire: Treating Pathological Gamblers and Their Families, “The National Psychologist”, Sep/Oct, 2007, p. 16;
Lobsinger, C., & Beckett, L., (1966) Odds on the break even: A practical approach to gambling awareness, Canberra: Relationships Australia, Inc.; Machemer, Jr., Richard H., Editor (1997) Training Program in Aging and Developmentally Disabled, Strong Center, University of Rochester School of Medicine and Dentistry, New York
